By far the biggest concern others have expressed to us regarding our upcoming trip is that we remain 6 in the world and don’t drop down to 5. We have spent a lot of time thinking about the safety and continued possession of our offspring. After extensive research and domestic testing, here are our top 6 recommendations for keeping your kids safe while traveling:
6. Become Canadians. Americans seem to draw unnecessary attention to themselves through a variety of conspicuous behaviors including speaking loudly and wearing flashy or impractical outfits. To prevent your children from standing out to potential criminals, teach them the Great Northern dialect and dress them in organic clothing. Make sure they insert an “eh” at the end of at least every other sentence and turn the “ow” in “about” into a “oo” like “a boot.” Throw a maple leaf patch or decal on at least one piece of each child’s clothing.
5. Use technology to stay close. While Kiddie Lo-jack would be a nice step, GPS implants would open a Pandora’s box of privacy and moral issues. Piece together the next best thing—a complete arsenal of Read the rest of this entry »
