A New Normal

by Tom on January 23, 2012

You know that friend you want to talk to but haven’t for years. As each year goes past, it becomes harder and harder to reach out. That is what has happened with this blog. I have wanted to write something for a while but haven’t because: we don’t have certainty, we don’t want to share bad news, or we are afraid sharing good news some how jinxes the good news. Well, it is time and this is my update.

On the medical side, things are going well. Anne has had a couple of clean scans. She is still on chemo and will be for a while, however they are stretching out the time between cycles, which will give her a better quality of life. We continue to be optimistic and so do her doctors. It isn’t easy and I continue to be extremely proud of her. Each time she has to walk into the infusion center, I can’t believe how brave she is or how she can smile her way through the process she knows will leaver her tired and weak for days.

On the family side the kids continue to do great. Things are different. I want to say we are back to normal but we are not. However, what we are is our new normal and we are embracing it. In the new normal, each kid is stepping up and defining who they are and what they like. It turns out Oxford isn’t an easy place to go as an undergrad and Dax is putting in a crazy amount of work. When he isn’t reading thousands of pages or writing novella sized essays, he is leading the school’s Starcraft team. McKane is continuing to show he has similar academic chops and is enjoying science bowl and Envirothon at his high school. We aren’t public school snobs, but it is nice to see a product of the largest public school district in the country handing it to the expensive local private schools. Kieran is choosing some of his own studies and is starting to get into programming and is learning Japanese. Asher does a good job of being the center of any group of kids any age she is around. She has had a great soccer season and is playing on the city’s all star team.

Really, you are going to take pictures at security?


This is my mom, she beats cancer before breakfast.


Who looks the most like mom?


Asher kicking the ball

You know what comes in small packages.


Anne and I love seeing them all doing their thing and growing up to be good and engaged people. Anne’s focus continues to be on healing and regaining her travelworthiness. Her current progress is the result of much work on her part, the prayers and support of many people and excellent medical care. Again, thank you, to everyone who helps us in so many ways.

For me it is time to get back to work. Since Anne was diagnosed, she has been my focus and keeping the family safe, together and growing has been my purpose. I consider us extremely privileged because I have had the opportunity to back away from my profession and put my energy into the family. During this time, I have also had some amazing opportunities on the side to work as member of a board of directors, to consult some amazing companies and to advise some future stars of the tech world. I plan on continuing to aid those companies as much as I can, but it is time for me to get off the sidelines and get back in the game: Anne tells me so, my psyche tells me so, our pocketbook tells me so, even my doctor tells me so. I am not sure what I will do yet. I will spend the next month or so exploring some options. I have already been approached with some potentially great opportunities. When I figure out which one fits into our new normal, I will remember to write about it here.

PS – Anne pointed out that this post is more like a Christmas letter than a Sixintheworld post. Well since we didn’t do a Christmas letter, consider it both a letter and post with a nice sunset picture.

One of many great sunsets this year.

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Holy Cow!

by Tom on October 14, 2011

It is hard to believe that is was only a year and 3 months ago that Anne was diagnosed with Cancer. It has been a long 15 months. The last 5 months have been exceptionally trying and tender. When Anne had her recurrence and was diagnosed with metastatic disease, our lives, which were already shaky from beating it the first time were turned upside down. Since then we have been working incredibly hard to help her recover, applying everything from the latest medical treatments to prayer and fasting to diet changes to some alternative treatments, however we have also been bracing ourselves for the worst case. Even as we did everything we could, we were blind to the effectiveness of our efforts. Anne’s energy has lagged and in many ways her suffering has increased over the 5 months. We were not sure if this was from a spread of the cancer or was a side effect of the chemo. Anne had tests last week and Tuesday we met with the oncologist who told us that Anne’s cancer is once again in remission and all the spots of cancer which were spreading quickly a few month ago, show no signs of life. This is the best possible news we could hear! All the suffering she is going through is working. We still have months of chemo to make sure it is gone and she has other side effects, but we are jumping for joy at the opportunity to continue to figure out our lives together and hopefully once again travel to far off places together.

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Pyramids aren’t pyramids any more

August 30, 2011

Although the chicken fights are getting much more even, our pyramids are no longer tall in the middle. I wanted to post a quick picture of us and link to a new post by Anne on her cancer blog. If you are interested here it is Getbehindmecancer.com. Share and Enjoy:

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Happy Cancerversary

July 23, 2011

So I was wrong and I did have another cancer post, because Anne deserves it. In what is hopefully the first of many, I want to wish Anne a happy cancerversary. It may have only been a year ago that Anne was rushed into the emergency room, but it feels like a lifetime ago. It [...]

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Here We Go Again.

May 24, 2011

If there are 4 words in the English language which are scarier than the 3 words, “you have cancer,” they are “your cancer is back.” A little over a week ago, Anne heard those words. Our family has been once again placed into a state of shock and we are once again doing everything we [...]

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Embracing the Extraordinary

March 11, 2011

I’ve always craved extraordinary experiences and through diligence and luck I’ve managed to pepper my life with them. I attended extraordinary schools, married an extraordinary man, gave birth to four extraordinary children, ghostwrote a few books (I won’t claim they’re extraordinary) while chasing those children, lived in extraordinary places, and traveled the world first in [...]

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I Like Cancer Best When It’s In the Past.

February 22, 2011

When Anne was diagnosed in July my heart exploded. Her sickness appeared out of the blue. In fact, I left her at home the very day she went to the hospital. She was planning on driving the 700 miles to Utah to pick up the kids. However, her stomach was hurting and I had a [...]

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It is a Karmic world, thank you @clementlehman

December 19, 2010

About 5 years ago, I was walking to dinner in Atlanta and I came across a wallet in the gutter. I picked it up and it had two things in it: 8 $100 bills and a pink business card with a girl’s name in parentheses and a Florida phone number. When I got it home, [...]

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