A Minor Update

by Tom on May 8, 2012

The words of a friend have been weighing heavily on me the last few days. We had breakfast during the middle of last week and he obviously asked about Anne and how she was doing. I shared and along with sharing how she was doing I told him I have had a very hard time posting anything to our website or Facebook about it. I mentioned that I very much like sharing good news and love the shared hope we have with all our friends. However, during the crazy roller coaster we are on, I find it very hard to share the struggles and the minor wins. My friend and I have shared notes over the years as he has a close friend who has been fighting cancer a little longer than Anne. When I told him how I felt, he mentioned that his friend has the same problems with sharing, and that he had been silent for a while, and everyone was very worried. His friend passed away on Friday.

I don’t want to sugar coat what we are going through but I also don’t want people to assume because I have been quiet that everything is in the toilet. So briefly, Anne was in the hospital for about 37 days. The surgery was potentially risky and we thought we were over the immediate hump when the surgery was successful. But, before she was in the recovery room, her doctor let us know that the next 4 days would be very critical and there were potential complications for which there was no cure. After 4 days we exhaled another big sigh of relief but it was another 3 weeks before we could get Anne home, three long weeks complete with major ups and downs. She is home and we have nurses at our house about every day. She is getting stronger and we are working with doctors to get her into another type of treatment but that is also a long road. The kids are all doing well, we continue to have the most amazing support system anyone could hope for and we remain faithful that Anne can get through this. We also are faithful that if that is not meant to be, our family will be together again and we are grateful for that and all else we have.

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Round 3

by Tom on March 29, 2012

I can’t believe I am writing this so soon. I think we knew it was a possibility because once you are in the cancer world you don’t ever really leave it, but at least you hope you will get some years between the battles. Unfortunately, in life, timing is not something we can always control. We didn’t get the break we expected and Anne is fully in the battle with cancer again.

As I wrote in the last post, we decided in January to define our new normal. It was time for me to get a real job, it was time for Anne to embrace life beyond cancer and it was time for our kids to become more of a focus.

I was thrilled to see Anne embrace life. She emerged from her chemo fog and started planning trips with the kids. I’m not sure how they came up with a round-the-world cruise as a goal, but they did. She started buying books again and I started referring to the UPS guy as her boyfriend because he brought her a present from Amazon every day.
She started taking a computer science class with Kieran at www.udemy.com. When the class proved to be too difficult for Kieran, she kept going and, true to her Phi Beta Kappa roots, she made getting an “A” in the class a goal.

I was fortunate enough to get a few professional options and decided to take a job with AEG as the SVP and GM of Axs.com. It is a great company and I am excited about the team and the opportunities we have to improve the ticketing and live event experience.
Again, timing is not within our control and the week I started, work, Anne had a test alerting us that her cancer had spread. After my first day and happy hour, Anne and I ended up spending the night in the emergency room with her 4th or 5th intestinal blockage. The previous blockages have all resolved in a couple of days, but this one is holding on and will require surgery.

Unfortunately our kids are not getting to be the focus, but they are blessed with great friends and grandparents who are helping to keep their lives going. They also are coming together for each other.

This isn’t an easy post to write. By nature, I don’t like sharing negatives with the world, however during round 1 and round 2 we felt prayers, good wishes and thoughts from everyone and we know they helped Anne recover. It’s time to add her name back to the prayer roles and circles, plant flags in mountains for her, stick prayers in walls, light candles, wish her well in your heart and reach out spiritually, however you are comfortable.

We are aggressively pursuing treatment. Anne has a regiment of alternative and conventional medicine she follows. She has added radiation for the first time and will be working with doctors to find the state of the art treatment for her.

Feel free to leave comments, although we will probably be unable to respond.

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A New Normal

January 23, 2012

You know that friend you want to talk to but haven’t for years. As each year goes past, it becomes harder and harder to reach out. That is what has happened with this blog. I have wanted to write something for a while but haven’t because: we don’t have certainty, we don’t want to share [...]

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Holy Cow!

October 14, 2011

It is hard to believe that is was only a year and 3 months ago that Anne was diagnosed with Cancer. It has been a long 15 months. The last 5 months have been exceptionally trying and tender. When Anne had her recurrence and was diagnosed with metastatic disease, our lives, which were already shaky [...]

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Pyramids aren’t pyramids any more

August 30, 2011

Although the chicken fights are getting much more even, our pyramids are no longer tall in the middle. I wanted to post a quick picture of us and link to a new post by Anne on her cancer blog. If you are interested here it is Getbehindmecancer.com. Share and Enjoy:

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Happy Cancerversary

July 23, 2011

So I was wrong and I did have another cancer post, because Anne deserves it. In what is hopefully the first of many, I want to wish Anne a happy cancerversary. It may have only been a year ago that Anne was rushed into the emergency room, but it feels like a lifetime ago. It [...]

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Here We Go Again.

May 24, 2011

If there are 4 words in the English language which are scarier than the 3 words, “you have cancer,” they are “your cancer is back.” A little over a week ago, Anne heard those words. Our family has been once again placed into a state of shock and we are once again doing everything we [...]

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Embracing the Extraordinary

March 11, 2011

I’ve always craved extraordinary experiences and through diligence and luck I’ve managed to pepper my life with them. I attended extraordinary schools, married an extraordinary man, gave birth to four extraordinary children, ghostwrote a few books (I won’t claim they’re extraordinary) while chasing those children, lived in extraordinary places, and traveled the world first in [...]

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